Scenario A: Even though it was agreed upon by everyone in the party that the bill would be shared equally, your friend wants to only pay for what they consumed, down to the last sen.
Scenario B: After you’ve been kind to them too often, they start to avoid paying their fair share and, on occasion, wait for someone else to pay before acting as though they had forgotten to pay.
Ever experienced these two scenarios? Then you’re probably dealing with a stingy friend. A stingy, freeloading friend can be stingy in all aspects of life. They are the type who would rather walk than pay for a Grab or stay hungry than pay for a meal. However, in the long run, they won’t realise that stinginess will cost them.
While it could be manageable at first, it eventually causes irritation and frustration, which results in repressed rage and bitterness that may or may not one day explode in an emotional avalanche that terminates the friendship. If you’re looking for ways to deal with a stingy friend, we’ve got the do’s and don’ts in dealing with them.
Do’s
Discuss Privately
Of course, it will be challenging to approach that friend, especially if they become hostile. But there isn’t any other way to go about it without telling your buddies that you don’t like the way they handle money. To begin the talk, choose an appropriate time and location. To avoid accusing them of anything and making them feel victimised, you can begin with “I” statements.
Plan Your Next Step
When you’ve addressed the problem, it can take some time for them to respond to your concerns since they might not be aware of how serious the matter is or they might believe they can still get away with it. But, you can protect yourself from being taken advantage of by offering inexpensive or free activities and declining their invites to upscale eateries or shopping centres. Reduce contact with the person on a daily basis as well, just to make sure they understand how serious this is.
Know When To Move On
If the issue persists even after you’ve handled it and given them several chances, you should say something or make a choice. It’s time to reassess the friendship and maybe let this person go if they no longer bring you any joy, and instead simply makes you feel exhausted, used, or stressed out. Money and happiness are also important.
Don’ts
Attack Them In Public
Nobody likes to be called out in public. Any argument in public can be embarrassing, and the impact is more when money is involved. When voices start to rise and everyone starts to become protective about their points, things can soon become ugly. It just becomes worse when you are aware that others are leaning over, listening in on the drama, and preparing for a potential fight. So the best way to deal with it is in private, or only with those who are involved.
Avoid Them Completely
This may seem like a smart thing to do. But then, again, friendship does matter. Most of us tend to completely avoid friends when they offend us or use us. But when you look back, you’ll eventually realize you miss their company and you could have done something else to solve the issue. Avoiding that friend completely will risk ruining your connection forever by making everyone around you feel uncomfortable or pushed to take a side when there was actually an opportunity for both of you to make mature choices. It can be tempting to avoid them, but don’t be hasty and approach the situation with maturity.
