The month of June is celebrated as Pride month for many overseas. In Malaysia however, LGBTQ+ issues are still considered a taboo. Nonetheless, taboo topics do not mean that the issues do not exist.
A Facebook user recently shared a story about her friend who discovered he was married to a lesbian. Needless to say, the relationship did not end well.
Facebook user Nur Fatihah stated that the story she was sharing was permitted by a fellow student she had met while studying in the Middle East. According to Fatihah, her friend had been studying for his Master’s Degree while working as a part-time Imam at a ‘kariah masjid (parish)’ in Kuala Lumpur. While there, he met a man who was keen to have him as his son in law, and offered his daughter for marriage. The woman was a graduate of a local university who had taken religious studies.
He agreed to the wedding, however, his then fiancé had two conditions. First, she wanted them to live in her family’s house after tying the knot. According to her, it would make their lives easier as the house was already well equipped. Fatihah’s friend agreed as his in-laws urged him to do so. The fiancé second condition was that they would not have sex until she had finished her Master’s. She stated that she was afraid it would disrupt her studies. He agreed to the second condition as well, as it was not long until she would be done with her studies. He also wanted to avoid arguing with her as he figured it would be fine as long as they slept in the same room.
Things started going wrong when his wife finished her studies, but still did not want to have anything to do with him, least of all sex. When he asked her about it, she would give excuses such as, she was still young or would tell him, “Don’t make me complain to my parents.” He prayed hard about the matter, consistently asking God for a sign as to what was wrong with their marriage. He soon found the answer.
One day, he needed to borrow her laptop as his was spoiled. He figured it would be fine as he was only going to download a few documents from his email. He intended to delete the documents when he was done, but a few image folders caught his eye. He assumed there was nothing wrong with him looking at her photos; he was her husband after all, but got a nasty shock when he clicked into one. The folder was full of intimate photos and videos of his wife with another woman. He also found screenshots of the two professing their love to one another. The messages were dated from 2019.
Shocked and hurt, he brought the matter to his wife. He couldn’t believe that this was the reason why she had refused to be sexually intimate with him after they got married. It got worse when he discovered his in-laws had known about it as well. According to them, the husband was at fault, saying, “if you as an ustaz cannot guide your wife onto the right path, (you should) be ashamed.” The whole family threatened to ruin his career if the story got out as they were well-known in the community.
The wife eventually filed for divorce in the Syariah Court, citing that her husband was hot-tempered, had not provided a home of their own and that their household was in shambles. The only silver lining to the whole incident was that he got out of the marriage.
No relationship can be built upon deceit. Had the family been honest and upfront with the man, they would have saved him a whole lot of heartache and misery. Hopefully, he has better luck with his future partner.