Dating is similar to having a massage. If it’s terrific, you’ll feel fantastic afterwards – recharged, upbeat, and like you have a new lease on life. On the other hand, if it’s horrible, you’ll feel guilty, depressed, and like you need to take a long shower. First dates are seldom ideal. Meeting up with someone you don’t know might be uncomfortable no matter how long you’ve been using Tinder, or how recently you’ve returned to the singles scene. However, who hasn’t experienced a horrible date?
If you’ve never been in a committed relationship and have been single for a longer period of time, you’ve undoubtedly been on a LOT of dates. This means that while some dates may have gone well, it’s likely that many of them were fruitless. And if you’re heading back into the dating scene, we have some advice on how to keep your date from being a catastrophe. Here are 10 no-nos when on a date:
Constantly Checking Your Phone
“Are you actually listening to a word I’m saying, because it looks like you’re scrolling through your Instagram?”
This is incredibly grating, disrespectful, and rude. Don’t be glued to your phone on the first date or the 100th date. Consider this. How would you feel if someone ignored you when you are attempting to talk to them? Definitely not something you’d enjoy. The whole point of going on a date is to get to know each other. The fact that you keep scrolling through your phone shows both your lack of etiquette and your lack of interest in your date. So, give your thumbs a break and put the phone down.
Drinking Too Much
Going on a date can make you anxious and sometimes, you’ll need a little booze to calm you down before meeting your potential partner. This is all well and good, but what if you take three shots and arrive completely wasted? Not cool at all. Although it might seem like common sense, make sure to be aware of your drinking limits before going on a date and even during a date. If you and your date are party people and your choice of date spot is a bar, just be sure to not over drink.
Talking About Your Ex
Simply refrain from droning on about your ex-partners because it makes people uncomfortable and on edge. It goes both ways: if you’re ranting, it screams NOT OVER IT and if you’re praising them, it shows you’re still interested. If you ask us, discussing your exes isn’t gonna benefit the new relationship you’re trying to create. In fact, it’ll only create tension. So best leave the exes aside. If you really want to mention any previous relationship, best wait for 3 or more dates.
Showing Up Late
Nobody likes to wait. And it goes without saying that you should allow extra “just-in-case” time to get there if you have somewhere important to be. Being late shows that you don’t care about anything and that you value your time more than that of others. It’s a bad feeling right away. Also, hearing them say “I’m on my way” for the next 10 minutes or so is just nerve-wracking.
Flaunting To Impress
Ya, sure. Impressing your date is fine, but you don’t have to go overboard with it. Contrary to popular belief, bragging about your wealth or good appearance isn’t particularly alluring. In fact, attempting to brag about how rich you are or how you used to buy things for your ex usually ruins dates. We recommend the K.I.S.S rule, as in Keep It Simple Stupid. No matter how rich or good looking you are, always remember to keep it on the down low. Unless you really want to ruin your chance of finding someone.
Touching On Sensitive Topics
Going on a first date – or if you’re still in the dating game – you should know what to speak about. When you first meet someone or when you’re still out on dates, it’s better to avoid sensitive subjects like religion, politics, or even sex. Whether you have upcoming dates depends on what you talk about.
Being Rude To Wait Staff
The worst thing you can do is act like a complete douche bag to workers serving you wherever you’re having a date. Not only does it create a ten out of ten uncomfortable atmosphere, but it also exposes you as a total a-hole. I don’t know about you, but when we see someone ordering the wait staff around like a military commander, we immediately want to wave goodbye.
Changing The Game Plan
Last minute changes are the shittiest. Imagine taking hours to put on makeup and picking an outfit, only to find out the date isn’t gonna happen. Total bummer! We’re not saying you can’t make changes, but if there are changes to your original date plan, be sure to inform your date about it. At least they don’t get their hopes up and you wouldn’t waste their entire day.
Bringing A Friend Along
We just hate it when it’s a date and someone decides to bring an extra friend as a third wheel. But seriously, when you’re going for a romantic meetup, the last thing you’ll want is a friend sitting right under your nose the entire time. Sometimes, it’s difficult for your friend to understand the message, especially if you are all close friends and have known each other for a very long time – even before your partner entered the scene. However, you must still inform them that they are occupying your space and that you need some alone time with your partner. In our opinion, any friend that doesn’t understand this situation is just stupid and you can dump them.
Being Touchy
Clinginess is a red flag. Spending time with someone you don’t know very well is typically part of going on a first date. Given this, it would be better for you to avoid being very “handsy” if there is any possibility that your date would not find it amusing. You must be quite certain that the other person will be into it before you make a move. Refrain from touching them if they feel tense in any manner. Remember that you’ve only just met and that there are clear boundaries in place.
