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Home Featured

How To Live Like A Girlboss Without Being Dependent On Men (Shots Fired!)

by Dean Zaini
September 24, 2024
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Let’s dive into a topic that’s as juicy as a ripe durian: the idea that women don’t need to rely on men. Now, before anyone goes into a frenzy, I’m not saying all men are bad—just that depending on them is about as wise as trusting a cat to take care of your goldfish.

Sure, there’s nothing wrong with dreaming of that classic fairytale: getting married, building a life together, and maybe even having a couple of kids. But in a world where men seem to stray faster than you can say “I do,” it’s time for women to reclaim their independence.

Growing up in a broken family, I watched my mom juggle three kids and a job with the grace of a circus performer. She was the queen of multitasking, all while my dad was off… well, let’s just say he was doing his own thing, like a lost sock in the laundry—never to be found again. Her strength taught me an essential lesson: if you want something done, do it yourself—preferably while wearing comfy pants and enjoying a plate of snacks.

Control & Empowerment

The truth is, relying on a man can lead to a loss of control and power in a relationship. Women should have the ability to make their own decisions and have a say in important matters. Being dependent can turn you into a spectator in your own life. Why give someone else the reins when you can drive your own bus?

Independence isn’t just a buzzword; it’s a way of life. When you rely solely on a man, you risk losing your sense of self. Imagine building a life where you can support yourself financially and emotionally—where your happiness doesn’t hinge on someone else’s choices. That’s the kind of independence that leads to real empowerment, and hey, it also means you get to choose the playlist on road trips!

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Vulnerability & Exploitation

Relying on a man for emotional or financial support can leave you vulnerable to exploitation or manipulation. We’ve all heard horror stories of women who found themselves in relationships that turned sour because they gave away their power. It’s crucial to have your own sources of support and security—so you’re not left feeling like a deflated balloon when things go awry.

Relying on a man for fulfilment can limit your personal growth and potential. Women should pursue their own passions and goals to find true fulfilment. Whether it’s travelling, starting a business, or picking up a new hobby, having your own dreams helps you cultivate a life that’s vibrant and fulfilling. After all, a fulfilled woman is like a well-watered plant—she’ll bloom regardless of the weather!

In Malaysia, divorce often feels like that one weird uncle at family gatherings: everyone knows he’s there, but nobody wants to talk about him. Women fear being labelled a “divorcee,” as if that’s the worst thing to happen since your favourite band broke up. Here’s the reality—being a divorcee is like getting a bad haircut; it’s temporary, and you can always change your style!

Embrace Your Independence

Emotional and financial independence are the keys to a healthy relationship. Imagine being so secure in yourself that your partner’s cheating doesn’t send you spiralling into a pit of despair. It’s about building your own empire so that if the prince gallops away with another maiden, you’re not left carrying the baggage of his bad decisions.

So, why not prepare ourselves mentally and financially before tying the knot? Life is unpredictable. One minute you’re planning your future, and the next you’re in a midlife crisis, questioning your choices. If only our past selves could hear our current struggles, right? They’d probably just laugh and say, “You thought you had it all figured out?”

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And if you do end up going through a breakup, it’s okay. Normalise it! It’s not a reflection of your worth. Instead, it’s an opportunity to reinvent yourself like a phoenix rising from the ashes—preferably with a new hairstyle and a killer wardrobe.

In the end, if men want to cheat or leave, let them. They’re the ones missing out on the fabulous life you’re building for yourself. So, ladies, let’s put on our metaphorical armour, grab our independence like a fierce shield, and face the world. Because if there’s one thing I’ve learnt, it’s that a woman who knows her worth is unstoppable—regardless of whether or not she has a man by her side.

But remember, it’s not just about preparing for when you’re left or divorced. What if your husband passes away? How will you stand on your own two feet if your entire life has been dependent on him? Building your independence is a safeguard for all of life’s uncertainties. Be ready to take charge, no matter what life throws your way—even if it’s a flying pair of socks!

#RELATIONSHIPSemotional independencefinancial independenceindependencelife uncertaintiesmental preparationPersonal Growthself-sufficiency.self-worthwomenwomen's rights
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