The new “Star Wars: The Last Jedi” blockbuster is coming out next week. That said, stores have already been selling merchandise in celebration of the highly-anticipated release.
However, a collection of newly-released “Star Wars” toys, called Star Toys, promises to take you on a pleasurable galaxy far, far away. For those thinking of embracing the dark side, here are a range of sex toys to awaken the forces in your nether regions.
Enter Geeky Sex Toys, the company from Brisbane, Australia responsible for selling a bunch of sex toys that mimic some of your favourite Star Wars props and characters from the franchise. Regardless if you’re going into the galaxy (Han) solo or exploring some Force-awakening fun with your partner, Star Toys has something for everyone.
“This year we had a bunch of requests for different types of sex toys based around villian characters. We decided that our Star Toys range was a great way to introduce a new level of kink to our products,” Geeky Sex Toys co-founder Emma told Mashable.
Did we mention that the Star Toys line also include glowing lightsaber dildos? There is a wide array of vibrators – “R2-V2,” “Darth Vibrator”, and “Vibe Trooper” designs – that can be recharged via USB. The 5-inch green silicone dildo is said to be inspired by the legendary Jedi Master, Yoda, himself.
There is also the 6-piece “Dark Side Bondage Kit” (pictured below) that comes with a ball gag, wrist and ankle cuffs, a collar, a masquerade mask, and a lightsaber-esque flogger. Although Geeky Sex Toys claims to up the ante on the kinkiness, netizens seem to think that the gears on Kylo Ren and Darth Vader are a lot more kinkier.
Not a “Star Wars” fans? No problem, we heard that Geeky Sex Toys has also produced Pokemon-inspired sex toys (Pokemoan), and also toys based on “Power Rangers” (The Mighty Moaning Anal Rangers), and “Guardians of the Galaxy” (Orgasms of the Galaxy).
If you’re still on the fence, here’s a Yoda quote: “Do. Or do not. There is no try.”