Damn it Cupid, you’ve missed your arrow again!
It’s that time for the year again where the cards, beautiful bouquet of flowers, and edible underwear we see all point to one event: Valentine’s Day. Valentine’s Day is supposed to be a special day to celebrate love, but the negative bias towards the term “singledom” is undeniable.
But why is being single such a stigma? Because society continues to remind us of our inadequacy when it comes to relationships? Instead of moping around in sadness this Valentine’s day, we urge you celebrate your singledom!
The best part about being single is you become less apprehensive with attachment and more concerned with your inner happiness. To quote author Brittany Rucka, “Being single, I have learned how much I am worth and what I deserve. I have learned what I want in a relationship and what I do not want. Being single gave me the opportunity to take a deep look at myself to discover what keeps me going, and what tears me apart.”
While some days are bound to be lonely, know that you have friends and family around you. So whether you’re newly single by choice, been dumped, living a solitary life with your 10 cats, or simply #foreveralone, be proud that you’re single and enjoy the journey.
We’ve compiled a playlist of 10 songs for everyone who is single and doing A-okay. Consider this our Valentine’s Day gift to you :)
1. “Single” – Natasha Bedingfield
Lyrics: “This is my current single status/ My declaration of independence/ There’s no way I’m tradin’ places/ Right now a star’s in the ascendant.”
Natasha Bedingfield made a number of pertinent points during her 2004 debut single. There’s no shame in being single y’all. In the meantime, she’s happily exploring her options (“I know I’ll settle down one day, but till then I like it that way“). We love that this song celebrates confidence in being independent.
2. “Ridin’ Solo” – Jason Derulo
Lyrics: “Now I’m feeling how I should, never knew single could feel this good/ So flex how I spread my wings, loving myself makes me wanna sing.”
Upbeat and fun, Derulo conquers his sadness from a break-up by embracing the single life. Suited up in a spiky white jacket and tight pants, the R&B singer’s too busy enjoying his bachelorhood as he parties the night life away and mingles with pretty chicks.
3. “I Don’t Need A Man” – The Pussycat Dolls
Lyrics: “I don’t need a man to make me feel good/ I get off doing my thing/ I don’t need a ring around my finger/ To make me feel complete/ So let me break it down/ I can get off when you ain’t around.”
The title says it all. Nicole Scherzinger and her backup dancers do want men in their life, they just don’t need them. Though not exactly well known for their feminism, the track “I Don’t Need A Man” struck a chord with many ladies as Scherzinger sings a list of self-worth mantra before going there: “I can get off when you ain’t around”.
Men, consider yourselves warned.
4. “Single Ladies (Put A Ring On It)” – Beyonce
Lyrics: “What I deserve/ Is a man that makes me then takes me/ And delivers me to a destiny, to infinity and beyond/ Say I’m the one you want/ If you don’t, you’ll be alone/ And like a ghost I’ll be gon.”
As if Queen Bee wouldn’t make the list. Beyonce is undoubtedly the queen of female empowerment. From Destiny’s Child’s “Survivor” and “Independent Women” to her own 2011 hit “Run The World (Girls)”, Beyonce’s iconic song preaches that you’re better off single than to be with a partner that wouldn’t commit, or worse – doesn’t appreciate you.
5. “Stronger (What Doesn’t Kill You)” – Kelly Clarkson
Lyrics: “What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger/ Stand a little taller/ Doesn’t mean I’m lonely when I’m alone/ What doesn’t kill you makes a fighter/ Footsteps even lighter/ Doesn’t mean I’m over cause you’re gone.”
A broken relationship doesn’t mean your life has ended. The original “American Idol” puts a positive spin on her failed romantic relationship by highlighting the importance of loving yourself in her fist-pumping pop-rock tune.
It doesn’t matter where you are, everybody is getting stronger all over the place. Whether it’s at the beach, by the road, or at your exercise class, it’s the perfect place to let loose and move on. Clarkson has your back!
6. “Lone Ranger” – Rachel Platten
Lyrics: “I’m debating if I really need to/ Be tied, tied to someone forever/ Sure I get lonely sometimes and miss being together but hey/ I wanna roam from city to city/ Let the highway and the crowd fill the hunger that’s in me.”
Rachel Platten seemingly came out of nowhere when her breakout hit “Fight Song” exploded and everyone was singing along to the tune about not giving up. “Lone Ranger” is another personal favourite from her album, “Wildfire”, where she sings about not wanting to be tied down. Instead, she craves her emancipation to explore and absorb life as a singleton.
7. “I’m Like A Bird” – Nelly Furtado
Lyrics: “It’s not that I wanna say goodbye/ It’s just that every time you try to tell me that you love me/ Each and every single day I know/ I’m going to have to eventually give you away.”
Similar to Platten’s “Lone Ranger”, Furtado’s “I’m Like A Bird” is also unapologetic about not wanting to commit to a significant other. She also warns the guy that she could fly away any given time. Furtado likes her freedom, and there’s nothing you can do to stop her.
8. “Part Of Me” – Katy Perry
Lyrics: “Now look at me I’m sparkling/ A firework, a dancing flame/ You won’t ever put me out again/ I’m glowin.”
In Perry’s “Part Of Me”, the singer declares herself unbreakable after breaking up with her beau. Shedding her sweet image, she chops off her lengthy locks for a pixie cut when she joins the Marines. While we don’t recommend anyone making haste decisions, do take comfort in the anthem that promotes one’s inner strength.
9. “Young, Single & Sexy” – Rita Ora
Lyrics: “You know I’ll be at the party hanging with my mates/ Who am I to sit at home/ I’m too busy to wait/ I’m way too smart for that.”
Groovy and easy on the ears, Ora conveys a positive message about not being in a relationship. As the song suggests, you’re young, single, and sexy. Embrace that and not be a product of anyone or anything. You go!
10. “Can I Get An Amen” – RuPaul
Lyrics: “You better love yourself before you love somebody, love somebody/ Can I get an amen, can I get an amen?/ If you can’t love yourself how the hell you’re gonna, love somebody else?”
Love yourself sounds so easy verbally yet, it’s not. We tend to focus more on our negative experiences rather than paying attention to the positive evidence of our beauty and worth. Self-love, self-respect, self-worth – there is a reason they all start with “self”. You cannot find them in anyone else.
RuPaul perfectly sums all of this up with his uplifting and loving message. How in hell are you going to love somebody else if you don’t start with first loving yourself?
Can we get an amen up in here?